The Queen of My Self is not just another self-help book. Instead, it is a new way to look at life for women who are “no longer Maidens” but not so old that they are ready for a nursing home or dirt nap. Henes has a new land for us ladies who want more from life and it’s called “Sovereignty in Midlife.” If you haven’t become Queen of yourself yet, this is a must read book.

I learned that there are three stages to a woman’s life— Maiden, Mother and Crone. Maiden is the fair young thing, before motherhood and long before Crone. Mother is the childbearing, career era, after Maiden and just before Crone. Crone is the “wizened and wily old lady.” The woman we become after “the dizzying maze of menopause and emerg(ing) at the other end” can be the dark area in between.

Until I read Henes’ work, I wondered whom I was and how I had ended up in this dark place where I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to be (sometimes it’s difficult when we don’t have a title). I knew that I was well past Maiden, through Mother, but hadn’t yet arrived at Crone (I wasn’t feeling the wizened and wily old lady feelings). I had assumed that these things would come magically because there sure weren’t any role models around for me to fashion myself after (I assumed that this midlife phase was a waiting area so I could hop the Crone train). Donna Henes, after asked to write an article for a “preeminent international magazine devoted to the female spirituality/goddess movement” realized the same thing— no real role models. Instead of settling, she discovered the Sovereignty— the land where Queens reign.

Henes writes that the path is personal. She warns that the journey to your Sovereignty may be bumpy and you may encounter potholes and road kill— these are not uncommon. What lies at the end is “purpose, passion, and power” that we may direct “toward creating a more balanced and peaceful world.” “This is the legacy of Her majesty.”

After reading this work of art, I finally realized that I knew who I was— Queen— and that I was just no longer waiting for the Crone train. “Queen is “still active and sexy, vital and with the enthusiasm and energy of youth.” There was a fourth stage to this womanhood— and what a nice stage it really is— now that I know what it’s called.

Donna Henes earned her crown for being the advance party in finding a way through this mid-life mire. Now, I am working on my own crown as I start my journey to my land of Sovereignty.

— Sue Vogan